


The Naming of Zoes

by kathkin



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: Gen, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-29
Updated: 2015-09-29
Packaged: 2018-04-24 00:57:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4899358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathkin/pseuds/kathkin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>“Oh, good gracious! You poor girl. How awful for you. Is there anything I can do?”</i> In which Zoe tells the Doctor her full name and he's deeply sympathetic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Naming of Zoes

“Bureaucratic nonsense,” said the Doctor, waving his pen about in one hand and flapping their very important paperwork in the other. Zoe pictured it flying away in the draft from the air-conditioning and made a grab for it. He gesticulated it away. “Now, where am I meant to fill this out?”

He looked around the crowded atrium, taking in the total lack of horizontal surfaces that weren’t the floor. “Oh, just use my back,” said Zoe, turning about-face.

“Aha,” said the Doctor. “Good thinking.” He rested the form below her shoulder and poked at it with the pen. “Confound these slippery things. Whatever was wrong with fountain pens?”

“I can think of at least six things,” said Zoe as he shook the ballpoint.

He applied the pen to her back again. “Here we go. Now, full names – _Doctor – The_ ,” he wrote, the pen scratching her back through the thin paper. She bit her lip and endured. They really did need to get this paperwork in before the office closed if they wanted to stand a chance of getting Jamie back. “And – _Heriot – Zo_ e.”

“That’s not my full name,” she said in the interest of total honesty. “Zoe’s just a nickname.”

“Oh, really?” She felt the Doctor scratch it out. “What’s it short for?”

“Protozoa,” said Zoe.

She didn’t think much of it telling him – it just hadn’t come up before – but he exclaimed, “oh, good gracious! You poor girl. How awful for you. Is there anything I can do?”

“It’s not that bad,” she grumbled.

“Heavens,” he said. “Do let me know if you want to talk about it.”

“I rather like it,” she said.

“ _Really_?” He sounded truly astonished. “Oh, well. Each to their own. _Heriot – Protozoa_ –”

“Xeliar.”

“Hmm?”

“That’s my middle name. Protozoa Xeliar Heriot.”

“This just gets worse and worse,” he said, voice tinged with mirth as he wrote that in. “You seem to have enough name for the both of us. I jolly well hope they’re satisfied. Now, what’s next? Ah. Date of birth.”

“Oh, no,” moaned Zoe. This was going to be a very long day.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [this](http://classicwhofacts.tumblr.com/post/127817832744/fact-1156) Classic Who 'fact'.


End file.
